As a writer, I get numerous inquiries on how to become published, the best way to overcome writer’s block and so on). I recently sat down with the editor of WriteOnline.com and answered a few related questions and thought some of you who are writers might enjoy them. Please feel free to share your own tips below as I always love reading your wonderful and insightful comments.
As always, thank you all for coming here and sharing a part of your day with me. I am truly honored.
Brenda
Exerpt:
What prompted you to write Cinderella Was A Liar?
Living and working as a young writer and casting director for some of television’s most popular dating, relationship, and family shows in New York and LA allowed me a very unique opportunity to meet and speak with literally thousands of men and about love, sex, dating, and romance. The more I spoke with these men and women, the more I realized that, when it came to romance, women had men figured out all wrong. In interviews and when out with my own friends, I listened to women make excuses for bad behavior (both their own and that of the men they were seeing), over-analyze every last word and action spoken and taken by a man and beat themselves up for not having a ring by 28.
It also seemed as though the very things women convinced themselves men wanted were the exact same things men were complaining about! I decided to spend six months interviewing women and then take what I had heard and spend another six interviewing men. I asked them what they thought about one night stands, women morphing into their mate, their biggest turn-off’s, and just about every other question relating to dating, romance, and sex. I also wanted to write about the importance of dating and loving yourself and not allowing the desire for a ring and a big celebrity wedding destroy your chances at real love. Cinderella Was a Liar is the result of this process.
What was your favorite part of the process?
I am someone who thrives on the connections I make with other human beings so that, without a doubt, was the best part of the experience. To have the opportunity to sit down and listen to the experiences and wisdom that each individual took the time to share with me was a gift in more ways than just making Cinderella Was a Liar the best book it could be. I learn so much from my readers and the men and women who trust me with their thoughts and feelings on a daily basis. I am deeply grateful for every conversation and moment shared.
The greatest challenge?
Each step of the process—from signing with an agent, pitching, and writing and selling a book, to what follows—offers its own set of challenges. I would have to say the greatest challenge is to not allow yourself to attach your ego to how well your work is received. I say this even if the reviews are good. It’s easy to get caught up in the back-patting and accolades and easy to take a harsh criticism and tuck it into your soul, but writing is art and we all know that art is deeply personal. I think we live in a society that values “fame” above authenticity and I would caution other writers not to put their name on anything that does not feel authentic and right to them, even if that work will get their name on a book in Borders. At the end of the day, the essays and books you write will become a part of your legacy and that extends far beyond a mention in the Times (though, that is always nice). Also remember that touching one person is touching 1,000. In terms of the writing process, I was given a very tight deadline to turn in my work and that meant I was working 18 hour days for most of the 6 months I spent writing it. Read the rest of the interview here.
That’s a very helpful piece. Thanks for sharing!